Good Morning, from Vietnam

Well I arrived at my hotel in Hanoi after a 31-hour journey that took in four countries in 26 hours (England, Dubai, Thailand and Vietnam). Appropriately, it was the longest day of the year.

The hotel I had booked online before leaving home was a disappointment to say the least. As I was shown in to my room, two cockroaches scuttled across the bed. I later found out that the price I had paid, $21, was nearly twice the average for a hotel room in Vietnam.

Hanoi is one of the most exciting places I have ever visited. The buzz on the streets makes Hong Kong look like Singapore. The city has four million residents - and six million motorbikes. You take your life into your hands every time you leave your hotel (you can't walk on the pavements because they are full of old women selling half-a-dozen lychees or men drinking beer). I saw four accidents in the first 24 hours - and because no one has insurance, the two parties just shake their firsts at each for a few minutes, then drive off (apart from one case, when an elderly man was knocked down and left to bleed in the road). There are absolutely no road laws. Bikers drive on the pavement to under-take, while the white lines down the middle of the road are there purely for decoration. Posts have replaced the white line on some roads in an attempt to dissuade suicidal overtaking.

So far, my disasters have been limited to losing my cabin key over the side of a boat, necessitating a very thin crew member to squeeze through a six-inch-wide gap in my window. My shower gel also came open during the journey from England, covering most of my clothes. I got caught in a storm a couple of days ago and there were more bubbles than in a Matey advert.

Of course, I also suffered first-day sunburn (it was cloudy all day). I am now so paranoid that I plaster myself in so much sun cream, the locals stop and stare (although it could have something to do with the camouflage beanie and cut offs, 2 Tone t-shirt, lime-green flip-flops and the fact that I am six inches taller than any of the locals and sweating like Mr Blobby in a sauna).